Channel Todd Late Night News Edition

State of Emergency: Empty
My food bowl is almost empty, my food bowl is almost empty!!!!!

empty food bowl

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May I serve you?

Top Story in Business: Fine Dining
At the Longcroft Luxury Cat Motel in England, they have a fine dining restaurant for us finicky felines. They serve Salmon, Fresh Cod Steak, and Simply King Prawns, just to name a few of their menu items. They also have a Sunday Brunch that includes ham, free-range chicken and shrimp. While I must travel to Britain just to stay at this wondrous hotel, fine dining for cats isn’t left to just vacation time anymore. There’s a new trend out there to buy and feed cats (and dogs) gourmet meals. People all over the country are seeking out better foods for their pets, such as organic, all-natural, made in the US, and human-grade foods (and what do you mean you haven’t been feeding us human-grade foods this whole time). Humans will pay big bucks for these types of foods, as well, even while those same humans will resort to eating take-out, fast food, or pizza … again!

Add to that, that even us finicky cats – and yes, we are very finicky eaters, so keep on buying us that expensive food – even have our own restaurants that cater just to us (out with those human-only restaurants, in with the cat-only restaurants). One of the cat-only restaurants is called Duncan’s Fine Dining where they serve items such as Toona Tortellini, Fresh Nip Salad, and Pouncie Bread Man. finewineYou can even top it off with a fine wine such as the ’95 Chateau Domainecoon Majeur.

Furthermore, there are even celebrity chefs cooking for cats now, such as the famous Simon Rimmer. He’s a wonderful guy, working with top-notch veterinarians to cook up some fancy food that’s not only super tasty, but good for our sensitive digestive systems. As a bonus, I’ve included the video below where you can watch the wonderful Mr. Simon Rimmer cook up a tasty, gourmet dinner for  cats. So please watch, enjoy, and cook on, humans. Cook on! 

Top Story in Style: Cat-Fashionable Humans

fashionWe love this shirt. Sleek, colorful and fashionably fitted, it can look good on a number of different body types or in any type of laundry basket (our favorite place for shirts are those laundry baskets that have just been loaded up from a nice, warm dryer). This top is called the Festival Cats Top and can be found on the Animal Rescue site for the low price of $28.95. Us cats will enjoy seeing you humans in this shirt as much as you’ll enjoy wearing it.

Top Story in Health: How Cats can Benefit Humans
Check this out! Cats can help heal humans. While that comes as no surprise to us kitties, you humans may not know all of this. So, as the flu season winds down, remember to keep us kitties nearby to help keep you healthy and happy!
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Now for your commercial break
 

Top Story in Entertainment: Comic Break
It’s snowy out there … at least in some parts of the country (ok, maybe all parts of the country except California). So let this comic warm you up.
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Top Story in Sports: Kitten Bowl vs. Puppy Bowl
We’re excited for February 2nd. It’s going to be a big game out there. We’re pulling for our favorite team to win – The Great and Mighty Kittens!!!! Yay. Who’s going to help me root them on?? Everyone??? Ok!!! Game night, big party at my house. Don’t forget to bring your own catnip, milk and tuna. If you bring extra for me and the boys, we’ll give you a front row seat during game time!


Top Story in Opinion: I used to be a Fire Hazard
BeFunky_todders.jpgI used to live in a studio apartment in Alameda, Ca. It was on the top floor of a secure, 3-story building that had been built in the 1920s. It was a fabulous apartment, mostly because I knew how to get the door open as long as it wasn’t locked. Eventually, I even figured out how to undo the lock, so mom started using the chain when she was home, always worrying that I’d still be able to get the door open enough to squeak out. So, she started placing piles of stuff in front of the door, thinking I’d never be able to get the door open. And it worked.

But when she was gone, at work, I’d still work at getting that door open. One day, mom came home to find the door ajar, thinking that somehow, someone had gotten into the building and broken into the apartment. When I came running up the stairs after her to welcome her home, she frowned at me, but was whole-heartedly relieved to know we hadn’t actually been robbed. And then told me that under no circumstance was I supposed to open the door for strangers. So when she locked herself out of the building a month later, I refused to let her in, telling her there was no way I could have known it was her. Payback’s an empty food bowl, mom!

Thank you for reading! Have a good night!

The Giving Season

Tis-the-SeasonLots of people tend to give more during the holidays than at any other time of year. But both people and pets need your help year round. So this January, when giving tends to be at its lowest, think of donating items you no longer use. If you got lots of clothes during the holidays, clear out a few of your older clothes and donate those. If you got new sheets and bedspread, think of donating the older ones. If you got new pet toys and pet beds, donating those are a great idea. There are so many things we can give to others who need it at a time when a lot of people don’t think of doing so.

fruitcakeSo, where do you take the items you’d like to donate? If you have canned food, maybe that fruit cake no one wants, you can take those items directly to your local food bank. They are always in need of unexpired items. Donating cash to local food banks is always helpful, as well, as is donating items such as toiletries and can openers. And there are lots of people who couldn’t live without the help of food banks who have pets, so donating pet food and supplies can be tremendously helpful (please don’t judge … we don’t know the history of how people ended up needing help, and pets are often invaluable mates to those in need – these pets are also well cared for, and the first to eat, even if that means the human goes without food).

Homeless-ShelterHow about clothes, coats and bedding? You can take all of these to local human shelters, Goodwill, Salvation Army, etc. You also can find clothes donation bins in some parking lots. These bins usually aren’t associated with thrift stores (there are some exceptions). If the name of the donation bin is not a familiar one to you or if it’s not associated with a thrift shop, then they are often not associated with any type of charity.

old-catsAnd, of course, if you have used pet toys, collars, leashes, beds, pet clothing, etc., you can take these directly to your local animal shelter or rescue. A few notes on a couple of items: please don’t donate used litter boxes (or at least call the rescue first). Litter boxes carry germs. Sometimes kitties can carry germs, like with a cold, and not actually come down with it. Those germs get in the litter box and taken to the shelter. If that litter box gets used in a shelter, even after it’s cleaned, another kitty could loosen debris and germs stuck in the scratches on the bottom of the litter box. And kitties in shelters tend to be stressed out and more susceptible to illness. So voila, kitty in shelter gets a cold and now has a hard time finding a home because people are less likely to adopt a sick kitty. Also, with any items, call your local animal shelter to make sure they can actually use the items. If not, you can try donating these items to thrift stores, at local human shelters, and at a local food bank.

Also, with any donation, if it’s something you wouldn’t use, maybe its not worth donating. By that, I don’t mean that if you got a really ugly blanket for Christmas that you shouldn’t donate it; by all means do. What I mean by that is if that really ugly blanket you got for Christmas was supposed to replace the blanket that’s so worn out, falling apart, that you can’t use it anymore, then maybe it’s time to head to the trash or recycle bin with it instead of to the donation bin.

homeless-390x250Anyway, maybe you could try to donate one thing this January, whether it’s leftover Denny’s you hand to the homeless kid you often see on the street corner asking for money, or a can of beans you take to the local food bank, or a brand new cat bed you take to the local animal shelter. Remember that it’s often the little things that count, that mean the most to those in need. You don’t have to give a dog bed to every dog in the shelter, but if you give one to the dog that’s been there a while or to the senior doggy, they will be truly grateful; you will have made a direct difference in someone else’s life.

 

New Years Eve

CatI know it’s not Christmas quite yet, but since New Year’s Eve isn’t far behind, I thought now might be the time to talk. I myself am a bit of a party cat and would love to entertain at a wondrous New Year’s Eve Party. But let’s face it, even a party cat like me can get overwhelmed with all that champagne and want to just hide away somewhere. Or, better yet, sneak out the front door and take a ride home with someone else for the night. And I’m a bit of an outgoing kind of guy. Just think of all those little kitties who are shy, skittish, and unsure of strangers. Take my little sister, Penny, for example. The most a “stranger” has gotten in is a 15 second pat on her rump as she’s running away … and to her, a stranger is anyone other than me and my mom. I know she’s not the only kitty out there like this. So here are some tips for keeping us kitties safe and happy for New Years.

  • Remember that it’s much easier for us to escape when doors are opening and closing a lot, especially if alcohol is involved in your evening’s celebrations.
  • If you have a room that your kitties enjoy hanging out in, other than the main entertaining area of your home, keeping kitties in that room with a litter box, food and water (please don’t put our food and water near our litter box) can be a great way of keeping us safe, cozy and comfy.
  • Remember that kazoos, champagne corks exploding out of bottles, party poppers, balloons, streamers, fireworks, and any other strange and loud noises can easily frighten us; we don’t really understand what all that stuff is for and it can be really scary.
  • Please don’t feed us party food or alcohol – some of it can be toxic and dangerous to us.
  • Make sure we’re wearing a collar with your contact information just in case we should somehow slip out and get really scared. And if your kitties aren’t microchipped, consider getting it done, because it can be a great way to reconnect you to your kitty should your kitty end up at a veterinarian’s office or shelter.
  • Please have a good time; all I ask is that you keep your pets safe and stay safe yourself!

 

Last Minute Gift Idea

Downton-Tabby-1There’s a fabulous new book out called Downton Tabby! It sells for just $10, but I’ve seen it on sale for only $8. How can you beat that price? If anyone’s looking for a fabulous gift, for your friends, family – or ME! – this could be it! Check it out now! I just wish I could have been in it!

All Black Cat Cafe

Japan is known for it’s cat cafes. It’s hard to have a kitty in an apartment in Japan (they often have strict policies or no-pet policies), so cat cafe’s have been a big thing there. Recently, they opened a new cafe that has all black cats. And black cats in Japan are good luck kitties rather than bad omens. I think I like Japan!

Breaking News and Grumpy Cat

News alert: Friskies says “Grumpy Cat, Colonel Meow, Oskar the Blind Cat, Nala Cat, and Hamilton the Hipster Cat have come together in an unprecedented celebrity cat supergroup this holiday season to lend their voices to a very important cause close to all of their hearts — and their bellies — the cause of wet food for all cats. YOU can help by sharing this video. For every view (up to 500,000 views), Friskies will donate one can of wet cat food to shelter and rescue organizations across the country. Share with all your friends and help make a cat’s holiday wish come true.”

So watch the video now! You won’t regret it! (and THANK YOU FriskiesGrumpy Cat, Colonel Meow, Oskar the Blind Cat, Nala Cat, and Hamilton the Hipster Cat)

Camping, camping, camping!

It finally happened; we finally got to go camping. The weather warmed up enough for us to head out. Max said he was super busy, though, and couldn’t come along. Penny almost came in his place, but decided not to at the last minute. We were disappointed that Max couldn’t go, because he was the one who was supposed to bring the tuna we were going to grill. The rest of the food part didn’t really work out well, either. Salem had eaten all the Greenies by the time we got out to our camp site and we made Penny drink the case of milk I was going to bring because she’s funny when she’s drunk. By the time we took down our tent and came home from our camp site, Max came running down the stairs at home, saying he was ready to go! But Max, we already went camping. So now we have to go again and bring Max along with us. I’ll have to post a video of that camping trip, but in the meantime, here’s a video of this one!

Darned the cold weather!

 

 

 

 

 

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Ready for Camping

Darned that cold weather. Me and the boys are ready for our next camping trip, but that cold weather has prevented us from actually getting out and doing it. We’re so ready. Hopefully, videos will be coming soon of our adventures in our tent!